Loving me.

i know i have issue on anger management. but sometimes, i can control my anger. however, since my period was late, i sort of can't handle myself.

after a long of thinking, i just can't believe i want to sabotage my relationship again. i know i can avoid it, but i still do it.

he wants me obviously, although i'm waiting for someone else, but i can tell he wants this relationship to work out. why i have to sabotage this one again?

it turns out because i still think it's about my past; i was a whore so no one can accept me. so, i was thinking people will always turn me down and make me feel miserable, so that's i want to avoid the miserable, i make other people miserable. yep, i do.

the truth is, i can't accept myself, so i'm questioning how can people accept me. i think, i have to learn to love myself, then i can give someone else my love.